"Tell your children of Him, and let your children tell their children, and their children to another generation." Joel 1:3

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Mean kids

What is with these kids that feel like their day won't be complete until they've tortured some other kid? Yesterday morning, Timmy said something about getting called names at school so I asked him what happened. He told me about getting called gay, weird, and other names by a certain 2 boys in his class. This one brat....er, kid....at school sat at the lunch table and told everyone who thinks Timmy is not cool to raise their hand. Half the kids raised their hands. As he told me, his eyes got all red and I knew he was starting to cry. I stood him up and just hugged him tight. As I did, he made a heaving sound and just started to cry right from his gut. The kind that tells you a person is so hurt. I stood there and cried right with him, I couldn't help it. It just breaks my heart. I picture him sitting there eating his lunch and this kid does that to him. This and one other kid have been a pain in Timmy's side for a while now. They gave him crap last year too and we really hoped it would go away after the summer. It did not.

I decided it was time to get the teacher involved so I emailed asking her to call me. When she did I explained what was going on. She said she could tell something was bothering him this morning. She also said that he has told her about kids making fun of his size, but she was not aware of this other stuff. She told me that she is going to get in touch with the school counselor because she knows that, given the 2 names I mentioned to her as problems, it won't be worth it for her to talk to them. Let's just say she wasn't surprised by the things I was telling her.

When Timmy got home yesterday I sat down with him to talk more about the whole thing. I told him that he needed to start sticking up for himself more. He needs to not just shrug and hang his head when these boys say and do hurtful things, but rather he needs to hold his head high, look them in the eye, and tell them to leave him alone. I also told him to try and take away their opportunity to do this to him. Like yesterday when they were in the bathroom....Tim, these 2 boys and 2 of Timmy's friends.....and the one mean kid starts asking everyone who thinks "boy x" shouldn't be here?.....who thinks "boy y" shouldn't be here....Finally getting to 'Who thinks Timmy shouldn't be here? Giving this and the other boy plenty of time to raise their hands and make Tim feel bad again. I told him he should have walked out of the bathroom the minute he started in rather than standing there waiting and knowing where that was going.

I don't know. I realize it's part of being a kid and it's part of growing up for a lot of kids, but sheesh! This is too much. I used the opportunity, as I have before, to tell him to remember how much it hurts when people do this and to never do it to someone else....to never be the kid that another one is going home and crying about. It builds a little bit of character when you have to learn how to turn the other cheek and not let stuff get to you, but man.....does it have to be so dang hard?